[romaji & translation] Like a doll
 

Kimi wa dore hodo no kanashimi ni
Tsutsumareta ato de sonna fuu ni
Kokoro no koe o tozashita no kana
Sukoshi demo ii nee kikasete

Sukoshi demo ii kikasete

Egao wa jouzu ni kamen o haritsukete
Namida wa real o marude fake no
You ni misete shimae ba ii
Sore ga nozomi na no nara

* Aisuru kimochi wasureru koto
Uyamau kimochi wasureru koto de

** Nani ga okite mo shiranpuri de
Tada kizuka nai furi tsuzukete

*** Akirame nai kokoro suteru koto
Shinjiru kokoro suteru koto de

**** Subete no kanjou ni futa o shite
Ireba kizutsuku koto mo nai ne

***** Yorokobi mo nai keredo

Omoi o uchikesu ka no you ni hashaide
Omoide nado nai ka no you ni odokete
Misete iru sono senaka
Chiisaku furuete iru

Aisuru kimochi wasureru koto
Uyamau kimochi wasureru koto

Nante dekinai koto ni sorosoro
Kizuzuki hajimete iru n deshou

Akirame nai kokoro suteru koto
Shinjiru kokoro suteru koto

Sore ga nani yori mo tsurai koto
Da to saisho kara shitte ita deshou

****** Shinda you ni iki nai de

* (repeat)
** (repeat)
*** (repeat)
**** (repeat)
***** (repeat)
****** (repeat)
--------------------------------------------------------
How much sorrow have you had
Before you shut down
The voice of your heart like that ?
Please let me hear, even a little

Please let me hear, even a little

You can stick well the mask of a smile
And show your real tears
As if they were fake
If you wish so

* By forgetting the feeling of love
By forgetting the feeling of respect

** Whatever may happen
You keep pretending not to notice

*** By throwing away the never-give-up spirit
By throwing away the believing heart

**** You lock all your feelings inside
And you'll never be hurt

***** Though you'll never feel joy

You are making merry, as if denying your feelings
You are fooling about, as if you had no memories
But the back you are showing
Looks small and trembling

Forgetting the feeling of love
Forgetting the feeling of respect

You are starting to notice now
That it's impossible, aren't you ?

Throwing away the never-give-up spirit
Throwing away the believing heart

You have known from the first
That it's harder than anything to do so, haven't you ?

****** Please don't live like the dead

* (repeat)
** (repeat)
*** (repeat)
**** (repeat)
***** (repeat)
****** (repeat)

Thanks masa.

This line, "You have known from the first"

wouldn't it be if it was "You have known from the beginning" ?

^or "You have known from the start" would work too, right? :)

i really like these lyrics. they're her normal type of lyrics, but very sadistic and dark. thanks Masa!

Thanks^^

thx ^^

thanks!

GREAT lyrics!! I LOVE them!! :heart

Thank you so much, Misa-chan!

^Not me. :P

^ Oh my gosh -.-

Hi masa, thanks so much for all your efforts.

quick question if you don't mind...

"But the back you are showing
Is small and trembling"

talking about someone's back being small and trembling is a bit odd to me, but I see ayu often talks about people's backs. does the back have some special meaning or significance in japanese? thanks for any answers!

I'm not very sure, but I think it's not talking about a person's actual back, but more of a reference. In Japan, there is something known as the tatemae(建前) "constructed front" and the honne (本音) "real feelings". Each person is seen to have 2 faces, the tatemae which they show to the public, and the honne, which is their actual selves and true feelings. This works in Japan because the society is built upon very rigid social rules, so everyone is expected to put on a certain face to fit in, even if they may not feel that way inside.

However, nobody talks about tatemae and honne. It is sort of like a hidden but acknowledged fact, besides it's really blunt to talk about it straight out. That, plus the fact that it's totally not a romantic topic to dwell on (everyone having 2 faces? makes humans seem so fake and insincere, right?), that's why I think ayu settled on the more subtle references to the face for tatemae and the back for honne.

So in this song's example, when she said "the back you are showing is small and trembling", I guess she means that she can see the person's true self, which is small and trembling, aka weak, despite the strong front the person may be putting on (making merry, being foolish in the previous 2 lines).

Just my guess, hope it makes sense!! :D

Hi misa chan,

thanks very much for that. That is kinda what I assumed, that somehow 'seeing the back' represented seeing the truth behind the facade, wasn't sure if it was just ayu's own poetry or a commonly used symbol or concept that most japanese would know of.

can I also ask then, is the word she uses actually the same word you would use to talk about someone's actual back? (as in the part of the body) or is it a more generic term that you could also use to refer to the back of your hand, the back of the room, the back of a building etc...

basically, does the word actually mean a person's actual back, but in this case also have the extra poetic meaning?

Thanks very much for your answer, very enlightening!

I'm not sure if it's a commonly used reference, because I seldom hear it in other artists' songs. (may also be because songs by other artists are more about yay yay happy love most of the time :P) It's also too romantisized to be used in common-day talk too, so you won't hear it in normal everyday conversations. So I'm not sure if it's a popular concept that everyone knows of. :P

And yes, she uses the word senaka (背中), which literally means back (the body part). So the meaning is probably more poetic than anything. :)

:)

thanks again.

sono senaka
Chiisaku furuete iru

It doesn't mean that "Your back is actually small" but means "Your back looks small (because of the lack of self-confidence or so)". So I may have to change the translation like this.

Your back looks small and trembling

How do you think?

And I think this expression is poetic, as Misa-chan said. "Senaka ga chiisai" is not a common expression, though we commonly use the expression, "Seneka o marumete" (hunching one's back).

That's interesting. :) And I think the line "Your back looks small and trembling" suits the translation better! ^^

OK. I change the part.

Is small and trembling --> Looks small and trembling

ok, thanks masa :)

masa thank you as always for doing all of these! ^_^