I remember the first time I listened to Ayu; it was even before I really got to know anime and manga! I found the song Dearest on a website, and then I listened to it and I just found it... beautiful. I've grown up in a home with both rock and pop music around me, with all the music trends people had in my area, but my true idol was someone not many my age listened to; Céline Dion. Even when I was too young to understand the english properly, I listened to her music just because of her incredible voice and the emotion I found in her music.
And when Ayu became my new true idol, it was for the same reason; not because Ayu had a ground-breaking voice (Though it's definitely special) but her voice, music, lyrics, the way she sang, the melody; it all created something beautiful to my ears. Her songs are so many and varied; I just listen to EnergizE whenever I wanna dance and/or exercise, I listen to rainy day on a... rainy day
(lol) and I listen to songs like Days, Heartplace, HOPE or PAIN?, liar, GAME, criminal etc. when I'm in an angst-mood. When I'm in a 'fierce' mood I listen to LOVE 'n' HATE, GAME, 1 LOVE, Startin', Rule and many others. When I want some warm colours to paint my day with, I listen to GREEN, BLUE BIRD, fairyland, UNITE! etc. When I'm angry/sad it's A Song for XX, alterna etc and I could give so many more examples if I only had enough strength, memory and time to write it down!
Everytime I hear a new Ayu-song, no matter how bland it may be, I find special points in it that I see as beautiful and touching, something I can relate to or something I want to feel/experience.
To me, it's just that Ayumi has no like; she is creative, original, charismatic, warm and so mysterious and teasing that I just want to unwrap every layer of her!
And now I sound like a crazy fangirl... (:but I am:
)... Ayumi is just special, and I can always find new strength in her strength, always find new inspiration in her music, and not only that, Ayu's music has been with me for 4 years now (at least!) and these years have been among the most memorable and hardest of my life for so many reasons. So why shouldn't I kiss her plastic face on my Ayumi Hamasaki 2009 Calendar every night? (And her face on every page too...
)
And yes, I'm totally in love with her.
I'm even gonna buy her an engagement ring