Quote:
Originally Posted by Zeke.
It's easy for people to say this, and I absolutely hate that. It doesn't mean you have grown out of Ayu if you aren't pleased with her current state of affairs. I am extremely passionate about her music. I listen to her every day, all day long. She's the one thing I'm always in the mood for. It's odd because I can't break away from her music for very long. When I have nothing to listen to, she's always my choice. But, it probably goes without saying that I haven't been too pleased with everything she's put out in recent times.
I'll quote another user who seems to have the same dilemma that I do.
It is not so easy to walk away from something that makes you so happy. I listen to my favorite songs of hers and I am swept away. To even contemplate the possibility of not having her music in my life anymore, or following her releases, is just not reality. Her music, when it's really good, is just above everything else.
So to say "stop listening" or "move on" is very frustrating, because you see, it's not as easy as it sounds when it's something you love so very much.
My feelings of disappointment do not make me a bad fan, or anyone else who has similar feelings. I really can't express this properly but to give up Ayu when you have been invested in her for so long is kind of like giving up a part of yourself. She has been the soundtrack to my life for an extended amount of time. She feels like "home" to me. If I were to stop, it wouldn't be long before I started to feel "home-sick" for her music once again.
Plus, there's always those times she'll release something that shows true promise. That makes you feel like "wow, there's the Ayu I know! There's the Ayu I love! She still has got it in her to release great stuff like this!" It just takes so long for one of those gems to show up in a sea of mediocrity.
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I'd like to share a few insights that have helped me
let go of some of the disappointment and anger I've felt when faced with mediocre material from Ayu.
I don't believe it's healthy to be extremely attached to one musician. Nobody should have such an artist-centric approach to music. It's as if people are obsessed with this idea of finding
one perfect artist that they connect with on all levels and is, in a sense, the embodiment of music itself. That's insane.
There is a vast body of music out there. I've discovered new genres that I would've never imagined enjoying 3-4 years ago. Broaden your horizons a little.
I'm still very passionate about Ayu. When I'm an emotional mess, Ayu's music is the first on the playlist. However, I've learned not to dwell on her current shortcomings and eagerly await every new song and album in hopes that, this time, it will be something that will "blow me away."
To be honest, exploring and discovering new music has helped me appreciate Ayu's music even more. It helped me to understand her place in the musical landscape. All artists have their ups and downs, their peaks and falls.
To say that Ayu is "capable of better" is also easier said than done. The truth is, none of you know what it's like to be Hamasaki Ayumi or any other superstar of her calibre or magnitude. The stress and pressure that accompanies releasing material that
always matches a prior standard of excellence is extremely overwhelming (It's ultimately why my other favorite artist, Michael Jackson, died).
Especially when Ayu likely never had lofty ambitions to create such excellent material! Do you really think Ayu was like, "Duty yes, my goal is to make this the best album of all time!!!11" I don't think Ayu
ever put much thought into what she was creating. It just happened. Her success
was somewhat of an anomaly. Read the lyrics of
TO BE and
no more words, it's obvious that Ayu was confused by her success and the hype surrounding her music. It was beyond modesty.