Quote:
Originally Posted by truehappiness
I think in 2010 onward she showed sides to herself that we may have been better off not seeing but since then she has learnt from her mistakes. However, I think it was a necessary period of her life to get to where we are now and to lead up to what is to come from now on.
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I guess so. It's probably kind of my fault as well? I guess I believed her too much and trusted her too much. Falling out of fandom was also a time when I distanced myself from Japanese entertainment, other than games. I didn't want to come across her by accident, which did happen. Even just reading her name somewhere made me shake and feel like I'm about to cry. I wished that she would stop making music, so I could feel relief. But at the same time I longed for her. Like I sang her songs to myself, but didn't listen to them.
That makes me seem like crazy. lol But I guess she became a constant in my life. Someone I thought will always be there. Someone who understands. And losing that was quite difficult for me.
I think she probably had go through experiences that some or even many of us go through much earlier in life? Looking at how a grown woman, who is really smart and lovely overall, can be such a fool is quite painful.
I have to say, seeing people like you and some others on this site, though I haven't come here in ages, is a nice thing. ^^ I thought most fans would have fallen out of fandom by now. It's nice to see people stick to her, even if they like her current music less or listen to her without being the fans they used to be.
I come back and somehow write so much. But I guess it's nice to get some things off my chest. Especially if they seem to understand. So, thanks for that. ^^
I would like to know if we will ever hear those songs she got rid of or if they're lost for good. Maybe they didn't fit into her vision for the album? I would really like to know her thought process for these kind of things.