apologies to the moderations and people at ahs

[Enfluerage]

i'm really sorry. i really dun wish to be rude.
please accept my sincere apologies.

i really don't wish to share "religious beliefs", i'm just an anonymous person who spent so much of my life listening to hamasaki ayumi. i remember so many ideas behind her lyrics.

all her songs healed me from so many tough times in my life. which is why no matter how hard things were, i always could recover. whether i lost a job, lost money, lost friends, lost relatives, my parents divorce, had car accidents.

all along, my favourite line of my favourite song of my favourite singer is the last line of who ...

one day, i kept crying and crying when it hit me what this sentence really means to me.
"i pray you all will forever hear my voice"

i believe hamasaki ayumi has spent her whole career trying to describe Love without speaking of Love.

this is why all her songs heal so many people around the world. everyone applies her songs to their own personal problems. no matter what religion they are from, no matter how far away they are, they all still listen to her songs.

i'll try to spend my whole life trying to explain this sentence to everyone of the world, by speaking about Love.

[primavera♥]

Well I accept your apology. Its nice u realize. Like what u just said here. Its acceptable imo.

I know everyone has their personal experiences with ayu and music and general. Yours happened to pertain to your religion
And many people are easily offended when anyone discusses those things. Its not allowed.

Please just be careful in the future where u post things like that in AHS and other places. Here at AHS its simply against the rules along with discussion of many other things

There's other places, I'm sure, to discuss and share those sort of incredibly in depth thoughts and ideas and beliefs. Just not here.

Its unfortunate that because your feelings about ayu and lyrics are tied to religion so u can't discuss yours wholly like many others can
But u will just have to make do with sharing only part of your ideals thats how it works

I hope I'm not coming off as mean. I don't want to be mean. Just don't share any of that here. Ever. Please

[sugarbasil]

My deal with this is the fact that after I told you that those types of threads are not allowed and will all be closed you went ahead and made another one, the most religious one of the batch, at that. You ignored directions to stop. And absolutely nothing annoys me quicker or more than intrusive religion. It puts me in a rotten mood faster than you can say "Ayu."

It's great that Ayu touched your life so deeply, and that you want to express that to the community. We fully encourage that. And this post of yours alone, without the religious aspect, is very insightful and touching. There's no reason why you can't express yourself on here without making it so religion-heavy. If you do, however, want to discuss how she affected you spiritually, you need to maybe find a Christian blog and talk with it's members. I'm sure people there are more that willing and happy to discuss something you can shed such interesting light on.

I'm very sorry if any of that sounded harsh, but we didn't want an apology: we wanted you to stop when we told you to.

[Mirrorcle Monster]

Dont feel bad for it, everyone makes mistakes, but personally i think you should really ask for some help, i think your life needs some help

[primavera♥]

Originally Posted by Heavenly Zerase

Dont feel bad for it, everyone makes mistakes, but personally i think you should really ask for some help, i think your life needs some help

Ummm...whatever did she say that makes her seem like she needs a therapist or has some psychological issue
She seems peaceful lol much better of than most people

I mean I need a therapist for stress. Or I want one lol. They don't.
If they need help, then I'm sure u need help

@sugarbasil...why are the threads like there. Like can't they be destroyed? Its so awkward to still have them there.

[ayufan-]

Wow i thought you was from a secte (or how is that called) and wanted to get followers online. But now i see a human with feelings, I'll acept your apologizes but don't forgot the past can't be erased. There Will always be people who think at you as for what you did. I hope you learned from your mistakes and know how to " behave" in the future

[Enfluerage]

many people here might form some kind of opinion of me.

again, i'll like to apologise to the people here for breaking the rules. i neglected reading the rules, and i accept the infringement points etc. i'm sorry i didn't read all the replies (there were so many negative replies) - i only realised my mistake when i received the private message from the moderators. people had all these unpleasant comments about me, but in reality, i was just writing what these songs mean to me, truthfully.

yes, it seems "intense" etc. but these are exactly what i think about them. if a person were to honestly write down what they thought (without caring about what others think), you too might write similarly.

did any of hamasaki ayumi's songs mean a lot to you when you had relationship issues, had a fight with your parents? when you lost a job? were you every horribly sad when you listened to hamasaki ayumi's songs? if you recorded your exact feelings at the time, i'm sure they'd be intense to.

i'm a busy person, i don't need to be writing in this forum.
i have a blog elsewhere where i write about beautiful things in life:
i write about:
- my friend who lives in a 5 million dollar house but would hug a homeless guy,
- a guy who travels midnight by taxi to ensure you get home safely, he'd walk out of a restaurant in the middle of a meal to buy tissue papers for those eating.
- a friend who would sacrifice studying for an exam to wait over 5 hours at an airport for a friend, whose flight was delayed.
- my friend who keeps friends together since kindergarten (over 20 years) and is always kind to them.
- a friend who would sacrifice a concert ticket to stay with you.
- friends who wait hours and hours at a hospital, week after week for another who is in a coma.
these true stories i write about, are not of a particular culture, reli[...]on, country etc.

people like reading the stories i write about, because they are inspired to become better people.

it was one of the biggest shocks in my life when i realised my real life observation of real people are identical to hamasaki ayumi's songs. for so many years i listened to her songs, i always remembered the meanings of her songs, without truly understanding them.

i have two degrees, including one with first class honours, you are free to think of me as some kind of crazy person.

i have a good job and plenty of savings (more than enough to fly 10,000 km overseas to watch hamasaki ayumi's concerts), seriously i don't need anything from you, i'll probably never meet you in real life in person.

i've read so much about Greek, Roman, Japanese, Mongolian, Chinese, Persian, French, English, Turkish, Saracen,
modern history, cultural history, miltary history, but you are free to think i live in some kind of dreamland.

i've travelled so much of the world, and meet so many different people of different cultures, but you are free to think i'm not down to earth.

i know so much about famous people in history: Washington, Gandhi, Schweitzer, Newton, Florence Nightingale etc.

i've read so much about philosophies of life, i really like meeting people to learn from others and their opinions.

one of my best friends says: "be urself wherever you go, because life is too short to blend in",
i say "choose who you choose to be" and i agree our time on earth is too short to blend in.

in real life, on the outside, people generally consider me to be a nice, sincere, kind person.

i'm also one of the scariest people they've ever met.
i'm so scary because i can make grown men and women cry.

my way of thinking is so independent of "worldly expectations", that when i tell someone how beautiful they are,
sometimes, they start crying because in their hearts they know how true my words are.
they start crying because i've tried my hardest to ensure my words are uniquely me and free.

very few people in the world see the way i do, because most people blend in.
most people wear certain fashion to please other's expectations
most people say things to please other's expectations
most people study to please other's expectations
most people blend in to please other's expectations.

and so, why do i still persist to write here, when i get so much negative feedback?
because i don't care about blending in. i agree though to abide by the rules and regulations of this forum.

because i would like to say just how truly beautiful hamasaki ayumi's songs are:
because i believe choice is beautiful, you can choose to accept or reject my writings.

in my opinion:

1) her songs are truly beautiful.
2) you can apply so many of her songs to different problems in your life.
3) if you remember her songs, they will protect you
4) if you remember her songs, they will make you better people.

5) hamasaki ayumi basically writes the same identical song over and over again.
Have a look at the lyrics of Last Angel

I believe you can hear me
I want to tell you
"This bell sound announcing The End
Bears no sad tone at all"
I'm by your side, I'm holding you
I accept you as you are

The only and the last one
There is such a Love

compare the above lyrics with who...

(i'll quote the lyrics of who... )

who ...
who didn't give up on me
i'll never forget
i pray you forever hear my voice.

again, i apologise for being rude. you are free to believe me or not. but if you have some time, have a look at the video clip of M yourself.

perhaps you'll understand why i keep saying there is a very good reason why her songs are truly beautiful.