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  #101  
Old 15th April 2010, 10:17 AM
masa masa is offline
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The official lyrics have come out and I found you are right. The part is not "enzetsu saikai" but "enzetsu taikai". I corrected the romaji lyrics. But now, I don't know how to translate it. I need some thinking time.

Also, I changed the line arrangement and a part like this.

wakaru dakedo --> wakaru n dakedo

Last edited by masa; 16th April 2010 at 09:08 AM.
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  #102  
Old 16th April 2010, 09:11 AM
masa masa is offline
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I changed the part like this.

And you restart your glib and flat speech
In a loud voice

And you make a glib and flat speech
One after another in a loud voice

Also a small correction.
obire --> ohire
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  #103  
Old 16th April 2010, 09:36 AM
masa masa is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by maikaru View Post
Also, I don't think "Hajimemashite" is how do you do...
I think it's "Get going." "Just start it."
How do you do really doesn't make sense,
Because first she says "even though our destinations might be the same"
and she keeps talking about how boys are so tiresome, so why would she suddenly say such a thing?

日本語で説明すると、「はじめまして」って「How do you do」っておかしくない?この場合だったら?この曲は「男に疲れた」とか「男は邪魔」の意味があっ て、
でそういうことについて歌い続けたんだけど、最後に、「はじめまして」って「How do you do」って絶対おかしい。つまり、「How do you do」より「はじめよう」っていう感じがある気がする。
The official lyrics have come out, and I'm convinced of my interpretation even more.

行き先がもしも一緒でも
初めましてよ 坊や達

Even if our destinations are the same
Say to us, "How do you do?", boys

She is saying that she and they don't know each other, though it's not true actually. She wants to behave as if she didn't know them, because she dislike them. In Japanese, it's like "私達他人よ". (I don't know how to say this in English.)
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  #104  
Old 17th April 2010, 01:13 PM
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^ I think I understand what you mean, masa. There's something like that in English, but it's hard to pinpoint or describe... but, the feeling of acting as if you don't know someone because you don't like them is definitely understood in the lyrics and your translation .
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  #105  
Old 18th April 2010, 05:42 PM
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^
^
hm, I get interested in the last part of the lyrics again.
May I be picky? hehe

Here's what I see in the CD booklet:
Quote:
悪いけど道あけてくれる?
アタシ達そこ通りたいの
行き先がもしも一緒でも
初めましてよ 坊や達♡
And masa-san's current translation is as follows:
Quote:
Sorry, but clear the way please
We want to go through there
Even if our destinations are the same
Say to us, "How do you do ?", boys
(1) I miss the heart mark (♡) which is in the official lyrics. I'm sure most of internet users can see it properly and I don't see any reason why we don't have it in the translated line.

(2) I also miss the question mark (?). I suggested adding it in my #15 post and I know masa-san chose not to add it, but I'd like to bring it up again.

(3) Is the first comma (,) in the last line of the translation needed?

(4) I like the idea of adding "Say to us" (or me) as I suggested in my #64 post. My little concern is that, if "us" is used in the last line, "our" in the third line and this "us" might be confusing. (haha, maybe i'm the only guy who cares such things?)

So, if I suggest a few changes based on masa-san's translation, they would be like this:
Quote:
Sorry, but clear the way please?
We want to go through there
Even if your destination is the same as ours
Say to us "How do you do ?", boys♡
As for the interpretation, now I think masa-san likes simple interpretations and simple explanations.


To maikaru-san,

Because there's "でも" (= though, even if, but, etc), it's natural to interpret that something unexpected follows "行き先がもしも一緒" (= in the case your destination is the same as ours).
Simply speaking, my interpretation on the last line is that she asks (the) boys not to get too familiar with her and she says it without losing humor. I hope the last line of the translation conveys such nuance, doesn't it?
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  #106  
Old 18th April 2010, 06:59 PM
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^ it's more grammatically correct if you add commas before and after the "" marks. ^^
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  #107  
Old 19th April 2010, 04:49 AM
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Thank you!
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  #108  
Old 19th April 2010, 05:30 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by waterballoon View Post
^ it's more grammatically correct if you add commas before and after the "" marks. ^^
ah, really?? I thought both having/not-having commas were OK. thanks for the comment!!

i just felt the first comma was needless because i think the second comma is there because of the different reason. Anyway it's much less important for me than the heart mark (♡) and the question mark (^^
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  #109  
Old 19th April 2010, 04:26 PM
masa masa is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by oji-i-san View Post
^
^
hm, I get interested in the last part of the lyrics again.
May I be picky? hehe

Here's what I see in the CD booklet:

And masa-san's current translation is as follows:

(1) I miss the heart mark (♡) which is in the official lyrics. I'm sure most of internet users can see it properly and I don't see any reason why we don't have it in the translated line.

(2) I also miss the question mark (?). I suggested adding it in my #15 post and I know masa-san chose not to add it, but I'd like to bring it up again.
OK. I add ♥. I missed your previous post, somehow.
Regarding "?", I'm afraid that "clear the way please ?" looks odd. How about changing this part to "will you clear the way ?" or "would you clear the way ?" ?
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  #110  
Old 20th April 2010, 12:50 AM
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I'd say "clear the way please?" is the closest to my impression I get from "道あけてくれる?" Some samples of my suggestions are as follows:

"道あけてくれる?"
=> "clear the way please?"
or
=> "clear the way, please?" (I guess masa-san might prefer this though I prefer not to have the comma in order to make "please" less-formal and less-noticeable.)

"あなたは道をあけますか?"
=> "will you clear the way?"

"道をあけてくれますか?"
=> "will you clear the way, please?"

"すみませんが、道をあけていただけませんか?"
=> "would you mind clearing the way, please?"


And my another comment is as follows:

* The "our" in the third line is confusing, well, at least to me. I'd like to avoid being very explanatory, but "Even if your destination is the same as ours" is the best translation I can think of now in this context.

Anyway these are just suggestions. I'm happy that the heart mark is added in the translation and I think it's interesting that ayu added it to her original lyrics.


edit: one more sample added.
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Last edited by oji-i-san; 21st April 2010 at 04:18 AM.
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  #111  
Old 20th April 2010, 09:55 AM
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love those lyrics! Ayus lyrics are always so amazing!
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  #112  
Old 30th April 2010, 07:24 AM
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something really new and fresh, thanks masa
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  #113  
Old 1st May 2010, 03:19 PM
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When I read this, I actually laughed and felt amazement at the same time.
Word to word I read this lyrics.
Word to word I read and agreed:
This is exactly like my class.

Every word of it. These all three years of my life. Those boys had made my schooldays felt like I was in Hell sometimes.
Shouting, yelling, "cool" stories.
I can even name some of our boys in those lyrics.

Lately ... no, not lately
I've noticed since a while ago
That you are of a dominative and possessive nature
I see, but

Our boys were like this since the start of seventh grade. And still are.

Hey, we have often heard
"If you do sleep-talking, do so in your sleep"

If you are awake, tell a better story please
So that I may not yawn

Yeah those stories. Exciting? Not at all. Can you see I`m yaawning~?

Because your heroic story is
Filled with exaggerations
And no more in the original shape
Isn't it ?

This is just like one boy from my class.

* Sorry, but shut up please
I can't hear our voices
If you are so eager to talk
Tell it to your mamas, boys ?

It`s like this almost every lesson.
And I can`t hear anything because you are shouting!
Please shut up and tell it to your mamas ;3

Your story is way too long
I'm tired of glancing you up
My brief responses have toned down and down
Unfortunately

When you try to shout at them, no matter how loud, they don`t listen.
Unfortunately.

Hey, we have often heard of
"A man's romance" or so

But it originally means the thoughts
That can't be put into words

Exactly like mine and our girls thoughts.
Man`s romance?
Are you kidding?
Can`t you see I am laughing?~

But you are in a group of
Those who always nod yes
And you make a glib and flat speech
One after another in a loud voice

This is like the "leader" of our boys. He just talks and talks, full of that flat speech.
And with really loud voice actually!

** Sorry, but clear the way please
We want to go through there
Even if our destinations are the same
Say to us, "How do you do ?", boys ?

It`s like this when our boys are "play-fighting". You can`t really go through, can you? Well, it`s not that easy.
And yes, we are going in the same classroom. But can you finally shut up now?

This is my favorite and most personal song to me. You can see why? ; ) Thank you so much for this. When I`m crying because of those, I try to remember these words.

[This is part of loong~ letter I send to Ayu herself.]
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Last edited by Eewyi; 1st May 2010 at 03:24 PM.
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  #114  
Old 5th May 2010, 03:59 AM
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AS ALWAYS.....THANKYOU SO MUCH MASA!!!!
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