Song with the funniest lyrics?

[Corybobory]

Some songs just make you laugh when you hear them. Whether it be an 'original' use of Engrish, or the topic being sung about...

I've just had this song stuck in my head all day and can't get it out, it's Handsome Man by Robbie Williams. And just to let you know, what he says is true hahaha.

Handsome man

Hello, did you miss me?
I know I’m hard to resist
Y’all can come and help me
Pick the sweetcorn out of this
It’s hard to be humble when you’re so ****in' big
Did you ever meet a sexier male chauvinist pig
I’m going to milk it 'til it turns to cheese
Tell your babes in arms and o.a.p's come and
take a piece of me

If you drop me
I'll fall to pieces on ya
If you don’t see me
I don’t exist
It’s nice to meet you
Now let me go and wash my hands
'Cause you just met the world’s most handsome man
The world’s most handsome man

Y’all know who I am
I’m still the boy next door
That’s if you’re Lord Litchfield and Roger Moore
Have I gone up in the world
Or has the world gone down on me
I’m the one who put the Brits in celebrity
Give in and love it, what’s the point in hating me?
You can’t argue with popularity
Well you could but you’d be wrong oh

If you drop me
I'll fall to pieces on ya
If you don’t need me
I don’t exist
You voted for me
Now let me see a show of hands
Here before you stands the world's
most handsome man

Can you make me laugh and sign this autograph
(Though it's not for me)
Grip and grin, shake and fake, name and shame,
then I'm out of here
It’s not very complicated
I’m just young and overrated .. whoa ..

Please don’t drop me
I'll fall to pieces on ya
If you don’t see me
I don’t exist
It’s nice to meet you
Now let me go and wash my hands
Here before you stands

Please don’t drop me
I'll fall to pieces on ya
If you don’t see me
I don’t exist
It’s nice to meet you, now let me see a show of hands
'Cause you’ve just met the world’s most handsome man
The world’s most handsome man
The world’s most handsome man
The world’s most handsome man


...and he is, too :p

[Jennie Mae]

I love Handsome Man!! Such a funny song.
Right now the song with my favorite lyrics is 1985 by Bowling For Soup.

[Corybobory]

^That one is funny!! I remember hearing it when I was shopping, and I stopped and listened, and was like "whaaa???"

[Peruvian_Sky]

Check out any of Frank Zappa's lyrics. Most of them are hysterical. I would post some here, but the content might get me banned.

[drewbilation]

Just about anything by Julie Brown. While she's mostly known for her satirical songs, her 'straight' pop songs are pretty humorous too.

[Aisha_Angel]

I don't know why but in the new m-flo single; Dopamine, when I hear Verbal say "V-E-R-a bizzle-a-lizzle" I crack up into hysterics. It's crazy but it's so funny!
Another song I tend to crack up on is Starstruck ~return of the LUVbytes~; it's funny to hear the way Verbal talks in it at the beginning it's so cute!

[Larisa-chan]

Sir Mix-a-lot's song "I like big butts and I cannot lie" song is pretty funny

[littlefairyfromnam]

There was this french song called "chiguaua". Like the dog. I know I didn't spell it right. Vair viar strange..

[kinix]

How about D12's my band I like the mv alot ^^
And who let the dog's out pretty funny too =P

[nevets1219]

KOKIA - I Catch a Cold. It is soo funny when she sneezes.

[zoom_zoom]

how bout the "peanut butter jelly time" song? anyone think that's a funny song?

[Unfullfilled Juri]

"**** Tha Police" - N.W.A.

Right about now NWA court is in full effect.
Judge Dre presiding in the case of NWA versus the police department.
Prosecuting attourneys are MC Ren Ice Cube and Eazy mutha****in E.
Order order order. Ice Cube take the mutha****in stand.
Do you swear to tell the truth the whole truth
and nothin but the truth so help your black ass?

Why don't you tell everybody what the **** you gotta say?

**** tha police
Comin straight from the underground
Young pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~ got it bad cuz I'm brown
And not the other color so police think
They have the authority to kill a minority

**** that ****, cuz I ain't tha one
For a punk mutha****a with a badge and a gun
To be beatin on, and throwin in jail
We could go toe to toe in the middle of a cell

****in with me cuz I'm a teenager
With a little bit of gold and a pager
Searchin my car, lookin for the product
Thinkin every pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~ is sellin narcotics

You'd rather see me in the pen
Then me and Lorenzo rollin in the Benzo
Beat tha police outta shape
And when I'm finished, bring the yellow tape
To tape off the scene of the slaughter
Still can't swallow bread and water

I don't know if they ***s or what
Search a pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~ down and grabbin his nuts
And on the other hand, without a gun they can't get none
But don't let it be a black and a white one
Cuz they slam ya down to the street top
Black police showin out for the white cop

Ice Cube will swarm
On any mutha****a in a blue uniform
Just cuz I'm from the CPT, punk police are afraid of me
A young pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~ on a warpath
And when I'm finished, it's gonna be a bloodbath
Of cops, dyin in LA
Yo Dre, I got somethin to say

**** the police (4X)


M. C. Ren, will you please give your testimony to the jury about this ****ed up incident.>

**** tha police and Ren said it with authority
because the pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~ on the street is a majority.
A gang, is with whoever I'm stepping
and the mother****in' weapon
is kept in a stash box, for the so-called law
wishin' Ren was a pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~ that they never saw

Lights start flashin behind me
But they're scared of a pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~ so they mace me to blind me
But that **** don't work, I just laugh
Because it gives em a hint not to step in my path

To the police I'm sayin **** you punk
Readin my rights and ****, it's all junk
Pullin out a silly club, so you stand
With a fake assed badge and a gun in your hand

But take off the gun so you can see what's up
And we'll go at it punk, I'ma **** you up

Make ya think I'm a kick your ass
But drop your gat, and Ren's gonna blast
I'm sneaky as **** when it comes to crime
But I'm a smoke em now, and not next time

Smoke any mutha****a that sweats me
Or any assho that threatens me
I'm a sniper with a hell of a scope
Takin out a cop or two, they can't cope with me

The mutha****in villian that's mad
With potential to get bad as ****
So I'm a turn it around
Put in my clip, yo, and this is the sound
Ya, somethin like that, but it all depends on the size of the gat

Takin out a police would make my day
But a pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~ like Ren don't give a **** to say

**** the police (4X)


Police, open now. We have a warrant for Eazy-E's arrest.
Get down and put your hands up where I can see em.
Just shut the **** up and get your mutha****in ass on the floor.
[huh?]>


and tell the jury how you feel abou this ********.>

I'm tired of the mutha****in jackin
Sweatin my gang while I'm chillin in the shackin
Shining tha light in my face, and for what
Maybe it's because I kick so much butt

I kick ass, or maybe cuz I blast
On a stupid assed pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~ when I'm playin with the trigga
Of any Uzi or an AK
Cuz the police always got somethin stupid to say

They put up my picture with silence
Cuz my identity by itself causes violence
The E with the criminal behavior
Yeah, I'm a gansta, but still I got flavor

Without a gun and a badge, what do ya got?
A sucka in a uniform waitin to get shot,
By me, or another pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~pretty pony~.
and with a gat it don't matter if he's smarter or bigger
[MC Ren: Sidle him, kid, he's from the old school, fool]

And as you all know, E's here to rule
Whenever I'm rollin, keep lookin in the mirror
And there's no cue, yo, so I can hear a
Dumb mutha****a with a gun

And if I'm rollin off the 8, he'll be tha one
That I take out, and then get away
And while I'm drivin off laughin
This is what I'll say

**** the police (4X)


The jury has found you guilty of bein a redneck,
whitebread, chickenshit mutha****a.
Wait, that's a lie. That's a goddamn lie.
I want justice! I want justice!
**** you, you black mutha****a!>

**** the police (3X)

[Nu-NRG]

^^ what the.....
XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
that made my day

[Unfullfilled Juri]

That song is still a classic to this day.

[ayu3657]

My vote goes to Mr. Bungle's "Squeeze Me Macaroni" which consists of a bunch of sexual innuendos using food. lol. I don't think it's violating anything to post the lyrics because there's no actual sex words in it...

I wanna lock Betty Crocker in the kitchen
And knock her up during supper
Clutter up her butter gutter

Hostess Ding Dong
Wrapped an eggroll around my wong
While Dolly Madison
Proceded to ping my pong

Your Milky Way is M'n'M in your britches
And I'll tell you Baby Ruth it looks mighty delicious
Keep blowing my gum, cuz here I come
I'm gonna get you all sticky with my Bubble Yum

Knick knack paddy whack
And give your dog a bone, baby

Knick knack paddy whack
And give your dog a bone, baby

I was givin' some ****
To some french bread
It was a four course orgy
On the spread of my bed

French kissin' french fries
In my Fruit of the Looms
I get deeper penetration
With a fork and a spoon

I got yogurt meat loaf
Smeared all over my ass
I stick my weiner in two buns
And and then give it the gas

Sour cream from my spleen into Levi jeans
Gonna bust the seams with my refried beans

Ronald McDonald just loves to be fondled
With Big Mac he'll **** it
Like a Chicken McNugget

Colonel Sanders wants to
Goose Granny's loose caboose
He's gonna give her a boost
With that Kentucky fried juice

Sooper doop poop scoop
loop de loop, chicken coop
Shoot some hoop
top sirloin from the groin
Topped with **** cheese, sneeze, wheeze
From the skeez disease, wooi

Take a dump, baby
Squirt some gravy
Pour some sugar on me, honey
Make it brown and runny

Give a little Flavor Flav
Back from the grave
Gonna burn some toast
Pump some humpin' rump roast

Knick knack paddywhack
Jump in the sack, in fact
Jerk the smack and crack
Jack from the back
Bananarama or ramabanana
*****' Barry Manilow
On the Copa Cabana

Squeeze me macaroni
Slop your face with my bologna

Squeeze me macaroni
Slop your face with my bologna

Squeeze me macaroni
Slop your face with my bologna

Squeeze me macaroni
Slop your face with my

You gotta syphon the spinach
You gotta cream the corn
Sperm scrambles the eggs
And a meal is born

Cookin' like a beginner
But I'm goin' up in her
I had Fritos for lunch
I'm havin' bush for dinner

Chef Boyardee and the Three Muskateers
Shove Charleston Chews
In their rears like *****s

Holy moly, guacamole
Said my Chips Ahoy
I'm gonna pinch a ravioli
On the Pillsbury Dough Boy

Knick knack paddy whack
And give your dog a boner, baby

We came to pottie
We came to pottie down your throat

I love the "Slop your face with my bologna part. lol. And yes, Frank Zappa has some hilarious lyrics. My dad always used to sing his songs.

[Peruvian_Sky]

^^^Ah yes, Mr. Bungle. Mike Patton=genius.

[Keichan]

Well, in terms of jpop, DAI's song summer days cracked me up the first time i heard it (but the end was so bittersweet!!) the lyrics just seemed so different for them..ya gotta love the song though!!

[BanFan]

Definetely Summer Days and Yaida Hitomi's Creamed Potatoes! Terribly funny Engrish...XD

"Booing booing/ A piece of pineapple on hamburg steak..."

[ayu3657]

Originally Posted by Peruvian_Sky

^^^Ah yes, Mr. Bungle. Mike Patton=genius.

Glad to see another Mike Patton lover here. He's the reason I got into Melt Banana (I heard that he loves them).

[Belinda]

I don't really know right now off my head for a english song, but I think many songs heartsdales do are funny (like the rapping) V_V;